So, What Do You Do? A Multipotentialite’s Guide to Introductions

Great article that sums up all the possible answers. (I’ve already written my answer on Facebook, so I won’t repeat here.)

In terms of changing the starting question, here’s what I’ve started asking: “What is one ‘win’ you’ve had today/last 24 hours?”

I’ve been asking this as an audio level test while prepping video interviews, but I find everyone has an answer and it gets them excited, putting them in a better mood straight off.

I’m so pleased with myself for knowing what ‘overarching theme’ means 🙂

Your book was so much help to me to make sense of what I do (when I didn’t know myself!) I went from being a carpenter to “someone who helps people get the home they want!”

Good post Emilie and a topic that will be evergreen for all multipotentiality!

Thanks for the advice, Emilie! This post has come at just the right time. I’m still working on how to answer that question(s), and it usually leaves me flailing.

When people ask me what I do, I typically say: “By day, I’m a proofreader for a design agency, by night, I’m a freelance writer.” The problem with this is people immediately ask me: “What kind of stuff do you write?”

That’s the question I hate. Because I refuse to specialize, which is a huge source for criticism in the freelance writing community. I’m slowly learning to define where I want my business to go as in terms of the type of clients I want to work with, but I have no desire to limit what type of writing and editing I do.

So I struggle with that answer more than the first one. I want to be able to simply say, “I’m a storyteller” and have people be satisfied with that. But alas, that may be wishful thinking.

Great ideas! I had to deal with the “What do you do question” a lot last night. Luckily about 99% of the people I talk to seem to be intrigued that I do so many different things. I think the key is to not be afraid of what other people might think–they’ll generally be fascinated. Sometimes the people I talk to even start bringing up projects they’ve secretly wanted to explore but have been afraid to do. It’s inspiring to think you might be able to help motivate someone to explore other facets of their personality.

This question is a tough one for me too! So many good ideas here though, I really like your advice of throwing out the feeler first and then elaborating if there’s interest. I think I have a tendency just to launch into telling people exactly what I do when they ask, and sometimes it’s probably really not needed!

I tend to tell people I’m a designer, but with my website becoming an increasing part of what I do I’m feeling the need to expand on what I say. Then there’s also uni and my part time job. When I do elaborate on everything I do it leaves most people saying ‘wow you do alot!’, but it also feels so disjointed sometimes when I tell it that way even though it all makes sense to me in my own world. I guess for me there is some kind of sense and a narrative to everything I’m doing. It’s likely not clear to others though!

Thanks for your tips here Emilie! 🙂

Nice post, Emilie.

I love the “I help _____ do ______” approach. Time to get to work on figuring that out.

Thank you!

Icebreaker? Way to determine if you fit into their social class? I never know or care. I’m pretty shy and always seem to feel like answering that question is never really necessary. Somehow, over the last 50 or 60 years, we’ve felt compelled to know what people “do” to make their income. Who really cares? So…what I usually say, almost no matter who confronts me, is to change the direction of their silly question. I say, “Do? when?” Then I stand and watch them become confused. Then I usually say, “I’m really not that interested in what anyone spends their day doing to bring home a paycheck…I probably won’t ever see you at your Job. I’d rather know what you like to do for fun…when you are away from your job.” Sometimes I point out that typically when folks in the south meet, they almost Never ask that question of anyone. I have found this to be true in my life. A lot of times people will respond to my answer by saying they never thought about it that way, and then we end up talking about the fun things we like to do when we aren’t earning a paycheck. This is just my $0.02! Thank you for providing this platform to help people like us learn how to bring our talents together in a way that empowers us, and supports our spirit, our essence, and our soul. We want to know we make a difference in the world, and that we will be remembered when we are no longer in this space.

When I was younger, I never knew what to say when someone asked “What do you do?” I didn’t like being pigeon holed. The response that got the most interesting conversations going was “Whatever I want.”

Thankfully, I’m now of the age I can say – “Oh, I’m retired.” (Which is a lie but keeps things simple.) If they follow up with something like “Retired what?” I say “Retired businessman.”

If they keep probing I just pick one of my numerous past enterprises that seems to mirror them somewhat and say “Well, for a while I owned a … whatever.” And, we talk about that.

I remember once, in my early thirties, a fellow asked me to come to his office for a conversation. I was working as a financial consultant for a brokerage firm next door and was on their board of directors. He wanted me to buy him out of his portfolio of local investments. “What exactly is it that you do?” he asked. That time I just stood mute before him.

He looked at me for a bit and said, “Whatever needs doing, right?” He was right and that’s a fact. I still remember the incident over thirty years later.

My favorite line is, “I’m between gigs right now.” That usually confounds people to the point of being a conversation-turner. I can then direct or redirect the way I choose. Especially being a woman, we are so reluctant to define ourselves by what we “do”! Last weekend, at a reunion, a woman asked my husband and me what we do for hobbies. I really liked that question! – and it tells you much more about a person, who they are, what makes them tick.

Yes but… how do I introduce myself on my Linked In profile? How do I come up with a nice cohesive Fits-All-Sizes Title and Summary?? I’m really stuck and keep going around in circles…
There are the things I do now (graphic design, database management, workflow specialist, art account management)…
and there are the things I’m working toward now (courses in web writing and social media)
and there are the things next in line that I REALLY want to be doing (technical writing and editing)
and then there is that I’ve got inherent writing/editing talents but no proof/certification yet.
(Smooossh?)

A couple of weeks ago I was asked a similar question. A partner in my Impro-Theatre-Group asked what my true passion is. I felt ashamed because I don’t have one. So my first answer was, “Well, I just love to learn new things, more or less, all kinds of things.” (At the moment, it’s boxing, running, impro, vegan cooking, and upcycling clothes). But I felt I should narrow it down, so I told that I really was into playing the clarinet in an orchestra and singing in a choir. In some ways that is right because I used to do both and enjoyed it. Also, I’d like to get there again, so I’m thinking of joining a choir or taking music lessons. However, neither one is my true passion.

Since I have read about multipotentiality, I realized that my underlying passion is that I just like to learn or get to know many different things.

PS: I’ve just heard about your blog recently and I love the idea of multipotentiality! Thank for this blog and your TedTalk, Emilie.

Thanks Emilie:) Asking powerful questions goes along way!

Hello Emilie, wow this post was great, i found myself reflected in may of the things you said, i think i have used a few of those aproaches at some point but honestly the one i struggle more i would say is when i try to explain all the projects im doing at that point, most of the time seeing most of faces looking at me like “what on earth?, she doesnt know what to do in life, just focus in one thing face”. Im very happy to found this space and finally found a word that defines me :).. Thank u so much!

I’m that annoying person who asks you what you do. I’m asking because I’m interested in what people do for a living or for fun or whatever reason. I like people. There’s no need to get defensive about my motives. It’s okay to have a boring day job you’re not in the slightest bit impassioned by. Human boredom is just as fascinating to me as human thrills. I’m not pigeonholing you and I don’t perceive your diverse experiences as a threat. It would be great if we we could have friendly interactions not tinged with cynicism and fear. No need to come up with a quick retort that puts the question back on me or turns the conversation into a sociolinguistic argument about what the word “do” really means. Being undecided, eclectic or pleasantly confused is not a crime and I am not a cop. Be spontaneous and sincere. Pre-planning retorts and responses is unnecessary when someone is just trying to get to know you, pass the time, hear a good story and not look like an anti-social loner at a conference.