How is it possible to simultaneously feel like you are just too much and like you’ll never be enough? It is easy, actually, if you have a rainforest mind. And almost every multipotentialite I know has one. Myself included.
What is a rainforest mind?
After a few years of working with gifted children in schools, I felt I needed new language to describe the kids I worked with. I came up with the concept of the rainforest mind as a way to describe giftedness that other teachers could understand and accept, so they would be more comfortable letting me work with their students.
I suggested that people are like ecosystems. For example, they are like deserts or meadows or volcanoes, or rainforests. All are valuable and beautiful. They all contribute to our collective well-being. The rainforest is just the most complex. It is highly sensitive, creative, colorful, intense, prolific, intelligent, effervescent, and misunderstood. Like those kids. Like me. Perhaps, like you?
(By the way, you may or may not have been identified as a gifted child in school. You may not even like the word gifted. Many people I know feel uncomfortable with the label. Try not to let that get in the way of considering that you might have a rainforest mind. OK?)
Why do I feel like too much?
People tell you. Often. You are told to quiet down, calm down, slow down and dumb down. You talk fast and you think fast. Your brain is on warp drive all the time. Even when you sleep. If you can sleep, that is.
You may have been told any or all of the following: You question too much. You read too much. You think too much. You feel too much. You talk too much. You research too much. You do too much. You know too much.
Or, maybe you were told: You are too intense. Too sensitive. Too empathetic. Too curious. Too obsessive. Too smart. Too geeky. Too emotional. Too self-absorbed. Too compassionate. Too introspective. Too intuitive. Too analytical. Too anxious. Too creative. Too idealistic. Too weird.
Even if you were raised by loving accepting parents, they may have felt overwhelmed and not known how to feed your voracious appetite for understanding the theory of everything. Your interpretation of their responses, and the reactions of teachers, relatives, friends, and neighbors, may have been why you felt like you needed to shrink or become invisible. There was just too much of you.
And, on some days, you just might overwhelm yourself.
Why do I feel like not enough?
There are many reasons you might feel this way. Here are some of them:
You know how much you don’t know. You haven’t invented anything “insanely great.” You’ll never meet your high expectations. You dropped out of college. You dropped out of elementary school. You have too many interests. You haven’t settled on one career. You don’t have friends. You haven’t lived up to “your great potential.” You are easily overwhelmed. Your friends do so much more than you do. Your gifted child is getting bad grades in school and hitting kids on the playground. You make mistakes. You couldn’t save your parents from their dysfunctional patterns.
You see, folks with rainforest minds often put pressure on themselves to be high achievers. If you were praised excessively for your achievements as a child because you had advanced abilities, your self-worth may now depend on what you can do instead of on who you are. Not only that. You may need the bar to be high because your deepest soul demands it. High standards are important to you.
Either way, it is tough to sustain. So you believe you are inadequate, not smart enough, not good enough. Not enough.
The complexity of the rainforest mind is a superpower
Think about it this way: If you have a rainforest mind, pretty much everything about you is more. It is not too much. It is just more. Wider. Deeper. It is natural for the jungle to be more. More life. More death. More growth. More wild. More you.
And, of course, not everyone is comfortable in the jungle. So there are people in your life who do not get you – who wish you were a meadow instead of a rainforest. And because your moreness probably includes certain amounts of self-analysis, self-criticism, self-doubt, and self-awareness, it leads you to, you guessed it: Not enoughness.
But here is the good news. You are capable of embracing contradictions. You enjoy paradox. You thrive on mystery and complexity.
Too much? Not enough? At the same time? No problem.
The rainforest holds it all. And then some.
Your Turn
Do you think you have a rainforest mind? Does simultaneously being too much and not enough resonate with you, as a multipotentialite? Share your thoughts in the comments!
Looking for a multipotentialite-friendly coach who gets you? Check out our recommended coaches.
That is me. My mind is in chaos.
The rainforest can feel pretty chaotic, right? But oh, so, full of life and creativity!
What a great explanation. I could never explain this feeling.
So glad you now have a way to understand it, Kristjana.
I have read Paula’s book and I’m almost certain I have a rainforest mind. But I’m in the least ideal life for a rainforest mind- at home all day with no community of local friends, let alone anyone else with a rainforest mind? What to do…
Thanks for reading my book, Catherine. The loneliness is a real issue for so many with rainforest minds. You are part of the multipod community I assume? That’s a fine place to find like-minds, even if they are not local. Once it is safe to get out of the house, I suggest you find activities you love and then look for the rainforest-minded folks, now that you know what to look for. When you find one, you might take the initiative to introduce yourself?? Loneliness is one of the biggest challenges many of us face.
I so wish I could just be a specialist. ?
It would be easier in many ways to be a specialist, right? But your rainforest mind is so lush and rich and fertile. So much variety!
Hi there. This is what I’ve been feeling like for a very long time. Good at anything, the best at nothing. Lately maybe it’s less intense, but sometimes having so much I’d like to do and to be still hits me hard… like I don’t have enough time to do what I’d like to but, at the same time, always feeling like I should be doing something more than what I’ve been doing this all time… Yes, I’m definitely “too much”, or maybe simply “more”!
Yes, Carmela, maybe just “more.” And one thing I tell rainforest minds is that even though they are doing so many things so they feel that they are not the best at anything, they probably actually do many of those things at very high levels because that is who they are. Just something to consider.
Paula, you hit the nail on the head. I struggle with the too much/not enough paradox on a regular basis. I’ve gotten a better handle on avoiding overwhelm, but it still rears its ugly head from time to time. It’s comforting to know it’s not just me, though!
Yes, Karen. Not just you!
Oh wow! This is my life in a nutshell.
Great, Melissa. Sounds like you have a rainforest mind!
Omgosh, this is totally me. Not gifted, just all the rest of it. I have been called an enigma…never thought of myself that way. I make total sense to me. ha!
Many rainforest minds don’t relate to the term “gifted.” It may feel uncomfortable or arrogant or you know how much you don’t know. But if rainforest-minded fits, it might explain a lot, Karen.
Thank you, Paula. I am so owning this Rainforest Superpower!
I got around this dilemma by doing something extremely multipotentialite: I refused to specialize. I refused to specialize in unpleasant feelings. I refused to specialize in reproaching myself – for being too little or for being too much. I refused to look at it just from one side. I refused to take a single point of view.
Therefore, I broadened my horizon by developing yet another curiosity. Since every strength can, at the same time, be a weakness, thus I wanted to know: If I see my multipotentiality (although I didn’t know the word back then) as a weakness… is this just the weakness part of a strength?
Yes indeed, it is. 🙂
Let’s put it this way: In a rainforest, there are exotic plants (partly even undiscovered plants) of breathtaking beauty. There are other plants and some of them range from strange to bizarre. Some plants have delicious fruits but others don’t and some are even poisonsous. There are poisonous snakes, too. And animals of so many kinds – from hideous beasts to charming cuties.
You are not any one of them. You are all of them. Because you are… the rainforest. 🙂
Wow! What a great description, Harald. Yes. We are all that! No wonder we feel overwhelmed, eh?
Yes, Paula. Most certainly. It can be overwhelming from time to time. But it can, at the same time, be funny and fulfilling to watch semantic Tarzan swing eagerly from meaning tree to meaning tree on a thick, yet flexible liana. 😀
There is one thing about the word “gifted” I would like to add here because it makes me avoid the word:
I never felt gifted although people keep telling me things to the effect that, somehow, I am gifted. But never have I identified as gifted because I can’t remember unwrapping the gifts. What I can remember is development, growth and certain people supporting my development, opening the right doors for me or sparking yet another life-changing interest in me.
Do those opportunities count as gifts? The common conception of giftedness seems to imply something rather more biological, some fortunate genes maybe, but not a mixture of own development and mentors. Or am I simply misunderstanding what giftedness means?
Harald. Before I became a therapist, I was an educator for gifted children. People in gifted education and in the popular press are still arguing about the “proper” definition of giftedness. Some people say genes, some say talent. Some say achievement or IQ. Others 10,000 hours of practice. And more. So, I define it as a set of traits including high levels of intelligence (not necessarily high IQ, but it can be), love of learning (not necessarily schooling, but it can be), high sensitivity, empathy, intuition. Deep thinking, analytical. Sense of humor. And, of course creativity, multipotentiality! This is the rainforest variety of gifted. Some highly cognitively advanced people could be called gifted but not rainforest- minded. So, need I say, it’s complicated!? 🙂
Ah, thank you, Paula! 🙂
So, it’s not just the genes. This helps me a alot to understand it better. According to your detailed description, I seem to check all the boxes of a rainforest on two legs. 😀
Until recently, I would have given myself a different label: the somewhat old-fashioned German word “Sprudelgeist” (I am a native German speaker from Austria) which literally translates to “(well)spring mind”. A mind like a cold mountain spring, always pouring out the next refreshing thought – whether, in that very moment, I whish to drink from it or not. So to speak. In case I do not drink, I can still find the gushing forth from my mental wellspring very soothing. That’s the metaphor I have used until today.
thanks for sharing your insights, Harald! Great advice 🙂
Thank you, Luisa! I am very glad it helped. 🙂
Yes, you have described my life…all the wishes and wants, the moments of deep realisations followed by those of paralysis and doubts. Is this what I just discovered so interesting, really, or just a banality not worth wasting time on?
Great inspiring article, thanks a lot!
You are welcome, Luisa. There is more on my blog! http://www.rainforestmind.com. 🙂
I am so shocked to my core like you have read my mind! The exact same way of looking at things, the terminologies, the big picture approach where you can see patterns and networks within everything- people, their actions, the world, universe. I have felt exactly what you have written. I have even labelled my sense of overwhelmed feeling as ‘Too much but never enough’ syndrome. And no one could possibly understand this before I came across this perfectly captured worded explanation/similar experience. The choices, the research that goes into choosing, the desire to be a specialist while being a generalist has rung so true to me. Thank you for making me feel I’m not alone or crazy to be sure and yet in same measure have self doubt just because I can see everything at once.
Yes! Yes! You are not alone. You are not crazy. You have a rainforest mind!!
I so get this. I mean, I never wanted to specialize, but I get your way of looking at things – big picture; the research that goes into choosing (omgosh – so much research!). One day it occurred to me that being a generalist IS a specialty – like a General Practitioner physician. Nobody accuses them of being wishy-washy. When I was an Occupational Therapist (OT) in the Army, my branch wanted me to become a hand therapist. The Army really needs that specialty. But I just couldn’t do it. Well, I could have, but didn’t want to. I didn’t become an OT to specialize from the elbow down. I wanted to work with the whole person – in their entire environment. I liked being a generalist OT and came to see that as a specialty unto itself. I could work neuro, ortho, peds, inpatient, outpatient, ICU. I did briefly specialize sort of – in burn rehab and psychiatry – but those were both expansive fields for an OT. Still, I saw the writing on the wall for a narrow (in my mind) career path and I felt choked. I was either going to be constantly frustrating by challenging institutional limitations, or frustrated by the effort. I made the leap from OT to Medical Plans & Operations, without burning any bridges. Oh the comments that followed. The perceptions about what that meant – to include a step down. Like, why would I want to go from being a (respected) healthcare provider to a (grunt) medical service corps (non-provider) officer. Freedom! I say, Freedom! By researching the regulations, I knew that decision meant lost time in grade (aka, promotion path and therefore, money). I didn’t care. It was more important for me have freedom of maneuver. Few in the military really “got that” even when I explained how similar MedOps is OT. It was an easy transition. In fact, being a Med Planner with a medical background was a plus! The freedom and diversity in my new field made it easy to stay in for 35 years. And then as soon as I retired, I went to Culinary School. That’s where I am now. When military friends ask, what does that have to do with Med Ops and Plans (as though I must retire and work in the same field) I reply, “Nothing. Absolutely nothing! It’s just something I’ve always wanted to do.” And when I’m asked, what do you want to do with your culinary degree? I reply – “Nothing! I just wanted to learn from the best.” Oh, and I also do Voice Acting. I love the life of multipotenialite! Refuse to Choose (says the late Barbara Sher). I resonate with that like I do the Rainforest. Connected, inspired, curious, too much, not enough, deeply rooted from the tree tops.
I love that, Karen. “deeply rooted from the tree tops” Yes!
It’s not often I find something that fits like a glove; this would be one of those times. I think the most memorable thing for which I am so very grateful is when I was 9 or so, after some testing, the school administration made the recommendation that I be skipped three grades and my parents allowed me to make the decision myself. I chose not to, and I have never regretted that decision. Yes, I wasn’t being challenged, but I also lacked self-confidence, quite severely. My support system would have dropped out from under me as well as meaningful friendships I’d developed. It would have been so awkward (understatement). Psycho-social development is so crucial at that age; I don’t know how life would have been different for me had I chosen that path, but I don’t think it would have been beneficial!
Thank you for your insight and work on this.
The whole question of acceleration is a tricky one, MJ. Three grades would have been quite a jump. The general consensus in the gifted ed. field is that it’s important to consider each child individually to decide if it’s a good idea or not. Sometimes, grade skipping doesn’t help, not only for the psycho-social aspects, but also because school might continue to not meet your needs even at a higher grade. It is so dependent on the teachers! A great teacher can make all the difference (at any level). For some kids, though, it has been a positive experience, sometimes just because it gets you through the school system faster! It sounds like it was the right decision for you, MJ.
I should add that many rainforest-y kids are more emotionally mature than other children their age, so being with older kids might not present an emotional maturity problem. But it can still create social tensions if the older children are rejecting. Make sense?
Thank you so much for writing this article Paula! It really hit the nail on the head with a lot of my own personality. I was often seen as “gifted” Or “talented” But I genuinely dislike those terms because I feel they imply a lack of effort. I’ve always been the “over-achiever” of my friends and family, and often times I feel I just don’t do “enough”. I ended up dropping out of college, though there were other factors besides multipotentiality that led to my college career collapse. My goal is to eventually thrive as a rainforest mind and maybe one day, find peace in my own rainforest. :green_heart:
I hadn’t thought about it that way, Robin, implying lack of effort. Interesting. So, rainforest mind would be more fitting, eh? Sounds like a lovely goal.
I may have a rainforest mind as well!
I can’t help but have external opinions (unable to differentiate them for being constructive or critical)
make me have doubts on my choices, it hits hard and can impact the things I want to do because I’d be doing so in lesser confidence.
Making decisions and choices can be difficult for the rainforest-minded because you can think of so many possibilities and so many options, implications, and variables! Is that what you are saying, Prabhnoor?
It’s not really the choices that are difficult, it’s tolerating the comments other people (family mostly) make! It lowers my confidence in making a choice. Convinced their right, I get a poor result for a creation because my attention got divided with doubts. As you said, I do think of many implications and variables, but I don’t have the luxury to follow through them, as I find it difficult to not let others words get to me.
I am unable to brush it aside easily, too sensitive towards their thoughts.
Oh, Prabhnoor. I see what you are saying. Family relationships can be difficult for so many reasons. Rainforest minds are often highly sensitive and empathetic so that can also be a factor in tolerating their comments.
Thank you! I do feel that I am highly empathetic! Perhaps I can use that to keep cool next time I’m faced with judgment.
I am stunned by how much this resonates. At age 47 I have had over 20 jobs in mostly unrelated fields and still feel intensely frustrated that I haven’t found the thing that is really me. All these things have suited an aspect of me but not completely in a way that is really satisfying. I get overwhelmed because I immediately see the complete big picture of a situation or project with all its glorious potential and feel inadequate for not being able to make it happen most of the time. I am very much an introvert but have regularly been told throughout my life that I am a show-off, too creative, do too much, “is there anything you are actually crap at” etc. This feels uncomfortable and confusing because I don’t actively do things to draw attention and often feel that I am crap at a lot of things because I don’t see them through in the way I picture them. It has also taken me a really long time to learn how to say no to things – just because I am capable of doing something doesn’t mean I have to do it.
So, Kim, it sounds like there are many things that are really you, right? But it can be hard to manifest your gorgeous visions, although I’m guessing you do create beauty, just not up to your highest standards every time. This is all rainforest-y stuff. And, just so you know, I often tell clients that it is impossible to do everything they are capable of so, yes, you will have to say no to many things.
It’s truly amazing this power of our rainforest minds to see beauty in the chaos!
Absolutely!
After I read this article yesterday, I bought your book and read it. Then I cried for a while. I plan to go back and work through the exercises after I recover from seeing my life in print. I really wish you had been my gifted teacher in the 70s. Thank you for your work. I think it will be really valuable for me and all five of my 2e kids. (BTW, it only took me 20 minutes and three complete rewrites to send this comment ?)
Hey, good job, Kate. Only 20 minutes and 3 rewrites! Yeah! Crying when reading my book seems to be a thing. Thank you for reading it. 🙂
This left me shook so deeply, I loved this. The whole time I was reading, I was nodding and thinking “YES” I got emotional- this isn’t the first article I’ve read that talks about a new way to look at a multipotentialite brain, but it still made me tear up from just feeling understood and not alone. Thank you for this Paula- I absolutely love this concept.
You are so welcome, Kelsey!
I’m wondering how the multi-potentialite and/or rainforest minds cross over the neurodivergent population? Like one of those diagrams with the circles that overlap.. and why do we like to label ourselves with these words? To know thyself is the beginning of wisdom but what does all this introspection serve? Your articles always get me thinking.
I would say that multipotentialites and rainforest minds would probably fit under neurodivergent. That said, neurodivergence is a huge category and I don’t know what the official definition is. Maybe differently wired brains? But also autism spectrum is called neurodivergent, ADHD, etc. I don’t study neuroscience so can’t really respond in depth. I can say that for rainforest minds, introspection and self-understanding is very helpful. It can lead to self-acceptance and then an easier time in relationships, on career paths, and maybe even finding your authentic voice!
On thinking more about the neurodivergent question, Gabriela, I’m not actually clear if giftedness is considered neurodivergent in those official circles. My sense is that gifted brains are differently wired and I believe there is some recent research on that. But I don’t have firm data on the subject. And I was putting multipotentialites and rainforest minds in the same group. It could be that some multipotentialites do not have rainforest minds! Anyway, you also got me thinking!
Wow! This so came at the right time. I went to bed yesterday thinking “why have I not achieved XYZ yet? Why am I not satisfied?” and I woke up this morning thinking “why can’t I do everything I want at once?”. This article explains the mix of feelings I am going though and makes me feel so much better. I am not broken, I am just rainforest. And I love all kinds of forests 🙂
Now I need to find out (reading this whole website) what to do with it and how to change my environment so it is more accomodating
Yes, Victoria, if you read through my blog/website, you will find some answers to your questions. You are not broken!
I love love love this!! It resonates with me 100%!
The feeling of Inadequacy is what I suffer more, more than from severe childhood trauma.
Therefore I am really seeking for a validating Diagnosis.
But how to differenciate the chaos and Inadequacy coming along with multipotentiality giftedness, from the one coming with CPTSD or with ADHD?
Or is it possible to have them all?
If so, what helps?
Or isn’t it important to know, to get a diagnosis?
But how do I get the proper help without the proper Diagnosis?
It is complicated and confusing, Kali! You can definitely have all of them. If there is severe childhood trauma then there is likely CPTSD. To find out if you have ADHD, research online could help. There are articles on giftedness and ADHD at sengifted.org. Sometimes giftedness, especially the rainforest mind variety, can look like ADHD, but may not be it. In other words, it could be possible to self-diagnose as you find out more. You don’t necessarily need a professional diagnosis. That said, if you are going for therapy because of the CPTSD, it will be good to find someone knowledgable about giftedness so you are not misdiagnosed. There is a list of practitioners on the sengifted.org site. That could be a place to start.
Finally, to read words that exactly describe me, it makes me cry.
I’m glad you found this information helpful, Donna. Welcome to your rainforest mind!
I love the explanation of the rainforest mind explained in terms of the jungle vs the meadow. My whole life, I have felt like I have so much energy that I feel misunderstood & therefore, I am too much & not enough.
Glad you like it, Wendy. I’m so happy I got to share this information with all of you multipotentialites. You are so rainforest-y!
Reading this makes me want to cry! It’s me, and I’ve always felt so alone.
Carley. You are not alone!!
Yes, that’s me. I know too much, always thinking about what needs to be done, but at the same time feeling I don’t have enough knowledge and skill to do it.
Often, when you have a rainforest mind, you know quite a lot but you may also have an awareness of how much you don’t know! There is so much out there to know and you have so many interests. It can be confusing for sure.
This made me cry….maybe because I’m too sensitive and introspective. When you read something that literally sounds as if it came from your innermost self; it can have a profound emotional impact. “Someone actually understands, and it’s not abnormal.” A feeling of belonging like never before. Thank you so much for this!
Or maybe it’s because you are HIGHLY sensitive and introspective. And that is good news. And a strength! Thank you for crying, Matt.
Definitely always had my rainforest mind?????. Was labelled an extremist. Now embrace my HSP, empathic & multipotentialite ways. Feel at home in the rainforest & it actually is my home now.?
Welcome home, Lauren!
I like the term rainforest mind. Much more than being called annoying, at least.
How do I develop an appreciation for this more-ness, rather than wanting to become invisible and take up less space? 🙁
I feel like it’s impossible to be accepted when I’m being myself, and it’s very painful sometimes.
It can be hard to appreciate your more-ness if you’ve been rejected or bullied by others when you are being yourself. One idea would be to keep reading about rainforest minds (on the blog!) and see how others are learning to love their complexity, intensity, and big emotions, for example. The whole purpose of the blog (and books) is to help the rainforest-minded find self-acceptance, self-love, and to have fulfilling relationships, and a meaningful life. People can assume you have an easy life because you are “so smart” but like you said, it can be “painful sometimes.”
Omfg, this has perfectly described who I am, how I feel and how my mind works. I’m astonished. Thank you so much for shedding this light upon me! God bless you.
You are welcome! 🙂
Never having heard these two phrases put together, I had an intense dream a couple months ago. I was trying to escape by flying away from my dad, while singing “I am too much, I am not enough” over and over. I woke myself up sobbing. It’s nice to know I’m not alone in this. But what to do with it is the question.
One idea, Sarah, is to find out more about your rainforest mind and what that means. My guess is the more you understand about that, the more you’ll know what to do. My blog is a great place to start!